
Let me also say that Cream, you know, the girl you’re supposed to babysit and bang, is … little. I don’t want to quote it verbatim, but let’s just say that certain characters may or may not be out of certain other characters’ age ranges, to the point that some, if not all activities in this game may or may not be illegal everywhere in the entire universe. What makes this game so terrible? Well, it’s the first, and so far only porn game I’ve played that comes with a disclaimer that says, well… All right, enough dancing around the point. I respect anyone who goes out of their way to bring free smut to the world, but this game in particular, I have to fucking lampoon. I have no bad feelings towards the people that made this game. Now, before I continue bashing this game, shamelessly, let me just say this. If there was ever a porn game that deserved to get hit with the good old ban-hammer, this is it right here. Well, that’s what I thought until I played Babysitting Cream. This kind of behavior pissed me the fuck off, because I believe that people should be allowed to jack off to whatever they want to. They made it clear a long time ago that any incestuous content will be auto-flagged and kicked to the curb. Large services like Patreon, Steam, and PayPal have been cracking down on porn games recently, punishing all kinds of depraved fetishes and basically kicking you off their sites if you don’t comply with their rules.

Are you ready to hear about some fucked up shit? Don’t say I didn’t warn you. I might have to grit my teeth to get through this review, but who cares, I got dental. So, instead of setting this game on fire and running for the hills, I’m actually going to review it. But, I am the ultimate porn game reviewer, and I’m pretty sure I’d lose that title if I shied away from games that I personally did not like. That point is, this game fucked me up, and I regret playing it.

I just need big strong words to really drive my point home. Now, before you get on your soapboxes and lynch me for throwing words around – I know PTSD is no laughing matter.

And, some porn games are so far out of left field that they make you feel like PTSD might have been a more favorable outcome than having to remember what you’ve done. Some pain just cuts too deep, to the core of you, and leaves you a different man than before. They also say that extremely traumatic experiences can fuck you up permanently.
